Male members

After the bitterness and recriminations of Mayonnaise's ambitious attempt to move the gang from the beloved Paramount had subsided, the three male members - or arguably two plus Butter - regrouped at the God-forsaken shithole for some chow.

Space was at a premium in the usual seating area, so Peanut and Butter decided to try a new position. And after they'd finished (in record time!), they also decided to try sitting in a new spot. Light filtered through the Paramount's opaque apertures and gave the lunchtime encounter a romantic feel. Jelly was clearly enamoured with the contemporary seating arrangement as it was written all over his pants.

Peanut was seeking extra mouthfeel from his meat and despite avoiding the duck which was proudly on display in one of the bain-marie's vanity windows, decided to try a new providore of haute cuisine from within the Paramount's hallowed food court. After admiring his sultry sustenance, Butter was keen to open Peanut's beef curtains but he was unfortunately flying the Japanese flag.

Jelly and Butter conducted an audit of Peanut's calendar, which in a remarkable change of policy had been issued in the same year as the dates on display in the calendar. There was much mirth in the timeless conundrums of life imitating art imitating life. Jelly and Butter commended Peanut for his remarkable talents, which clearly stretch beyond Lead Choreographer and Fluffer of the Cheeky Chaps. He is destined to capture Larry Pickering's crown.

Butter admitted that he still regularly masturbates at work which brought empathetic acknowledgement from Peanut and Jelly. Between the three of them, enough white wee wee could be garnered to even sate the voracious appetite of Feargul Sharkey.

Jelly noted that Peanut was no longer wearing a tie. Clearly Peanut is only prepared to tie objects around his neck for recreational purposes.

The chaps bade each other farewell and headed back to the soulless, meaningless nihilism that is their daily lives.